I had no paper with me in the car
so I wrote this poem on a bottle redemption slip.

Redemption

Redemption:
that’s what I seek
and some days it seeks me.
A double need this need to redeem
and be redeemed. A double need too
this god I need, the god who needs me.

Lonely he will be without me,
and I without him.
Knock and the door will open.
Seek and ye shall find.

I look and, yes, he’s there,
him within me and me within him.

This redemption slip is all I need:
empty bottles on the one hand,
my empty heart on the other,
both now redeemed.

All of this while I sit in the car
outside a fast-food chain
wondering if a bullet will come,
to break the car’s window pane,
or someone brutal who will rejoice
in his heaven-sent task of delivering
my personal order of take-out pain.