Tell us about yourself

Tell us about yourself

That is one of the questions I most hate to be asked. What on earth is there to tell? One direction is the Muhamad Ali route – “I am the greatest!” Some people take that route and walk you down the highway of their lives, everything from winning the egg and spoon race (age seven), to coming second in the three-legged race (age 9), to finishing third in the slow bicycle race (age 11). And that’s just the start. A similar route is the 007 route – license to kill – shoot from the lip – a blast from the past – history, herstory, my-story – by me!

No way. My history is a mystery and long may it remain so. There are many magic moments (thank you Perry Como – my mother’s favorite singer) and many tragic moments. Some might be worth mentioning, most I’d rather keep quiet about. I think sometimes of the famous examination question – write down everything you know – except I can’t remember who was examining who, nor why they were being examined. Sounds a bit like the Civil Service to me, before they ask you to swear the Official Secrets Act.

On the other hand, if a person asks me a direct question, I will try to answer it to the best of my limited ability. Who is Lisi? I don’t know. Her identity has baffled the literary critics for close to 400 years and I certainly haven’t been able to solve it. Why did Cervantes write the Quixote? Try asking him yourself – but I guess if he’s been silent since 1616, he will remain silent for a lot longer. Not everyone is – or wants to be – the Memory Man – “We know Easter is a Moveable Feast, when did Easter Sunday last fall on Boxing Day?”

Trick question – Easter Sunday is a race horse, not a holy holiday. Boxing Day, in Britain, used to be the day for point to points and obstacle races for horses. But the Memory Man knew that. He also knew the name of every jockey, every horse, their weights, their odds, the order in which they finished, and the name of the fence which caused Easter Sunday to fall on Boxing Day.

So, tell us about yourself. No. I won’t. I am not the memory man and I will reveal as little as I can. Remember the old song – “Yesterday is history, today is still a mystery, but what a day it’s going to be tomorrow.” Right – now I am ready to tell you about myself. I am not yesterday’s man, I am today’s man, and today is still a mystery. Sorry, I can’t do better than that!

9 thoughts on “Tell us about yourself

  1. I LOVE IT!!!! I sure would hate to have to try to tell anyone about myself, but each time I go to a doctor that’s the first question I’m asked. Okay, does he/she want me to start with “I was born…” or does he/she mean my medical history? And people in new settings, do they really want to know or is it a different version of the old standby, “How are you doing?” One of these days I just might answer that one just to see how polite that person is. Will he/she stand/sit there and listen while the eyes glaze over? Or, and this is more likely, will he/she suddenly remember someplace in another country they are supposed to be. My bet is the second one. Oh, so many ways to tell about yourself or the weather for that matter.
    Only you could come up with a pop quiz like this!


    • Lovely! As good as, or better than, my original, which was a prompt anyway – and an impromptu answer. The love of language – and the larger question – do we shape it or does it shape us? The answer , of course, is that both happen, not in unison, but in one way or another. Why be a slave to language, when you can be its master? I hesitate to say ‘mistress, because that word has so many connotations. Wordsmiths of the world – unite – take the chains of language from your hearts and set yourselves free!

      Liked by 1 person

      • My reply got away from me before I finished. I mean really! How many times have I only had one word to say about anything? Unfortunately while fighting the computer to show it who’s in control, it almost won the battle, and I have forgotten all the other things I meant to say. Typical, but now just who won the battle for control? Computer or human? Computer is still on while human is getting frustrated, so…..


      • Human can unplug computer – but the computer cannot yet unplug the human. Action – 1. Say nasty word to computer and tell it what you think about its behavior. 2. Turn it off or unplug it. 3. Put it in corner with Dunce’s cap on. 4. Let is sulk for 15 minutes. 5. Plug it in and turn it back on if it promises to be good.

        Liked by 1 person

      • I’ve tried all the above, especially No. 1 but it csn’t seem to hear me. And I just hate to be ignored by something electronic! I’m still deciding whether to toss all electronics out the window or not. Probably wouldn’t even leave a dent here with only a couple of feet onto the ground to fall. But now I’m going to turn it off, place it behind my chair in that corner and totally forget about it… least until after lunch which will be served in 45 minutes. Pizza is on the menu!


      • Good plan! Nothing like Pizza when the computer’s on the blink! Enjoy your lunch. I made Clare avocado mashed with salmon served with mayonnaise in a croissant – almost as good as pizza.


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